Friday, December 01, 2006


Points in Time

Points in time.

Events in time create certain permanent branding within the psyche, a mark so deep, it shows up on both sides. This weekend is such an event. It was 14 years ago this weekend, the weekend after thanksgiving day, that my daughter Ann lost her battle with the forces that were destroying her from within. The actual dates are not quite on, but it’s the specific weekend that is permanently etched in my mind. Now, I can speak of it almost in a historical tone, the emotions have been subdued in their attachment in my voice, my eyes don’t tear the way they used to when I talk of her. I was reminded of it yesterday almost as a casual event. I would of course see the calendar, turn the calendar over, a new month, December, Oh, THAT month and remember the time, Dec 4-6, then dwell on her life. Where I work, a large federal agency, we are a sucker for blood drives. The local blood bank comes here every two months, like clockwork. Last week, they showed up, I had been seeing the hallway notices. I had donated in the past. With certain meds, they used to not allow donations, but now, I have been diagnosed with prostate cancer, so i couldnt donate. I still went to tell them, and get my name off the list Before I could tell the first contact, the lady asked me if I wanted to join the bone marrow registary. I asked what did that entail. She said that they just take a sample when they draw the donation, and I get registered into a data base in the event someone needs a bone marrow donation. She then said, “doing so is the step to being a donor of life”. The words struck a chord in me, and I looked at her and said, “Oh, I am already that. My daughter’s heart, lungs and kidneys were donated, uh, lets see, 14 years ago. In fact, 14 years ago this weekend.” She looked at me, and her smile had turned upside down, and she just patted my shoulder. On this weekend, I often think of the people that her organs went to. I wonder if they are still alive, especially the then twenty year old man that got her lungs. He had cystic fibrosis, and he was the only one that took the time to write a thank you note after he was well enough to do so. I never knew his name, the letters are sent through an agency, and names are left off. So at this point in time, I wonder how they are doing. For just as I am seeing this point in time as the time when I lost my daughters future, missing the life that my daughter meant to me, I wonder and hope that they also look at this point in time, and thank her for the gift she gave them, and give them a reason to celebrate this point in their time.

I will be off a few days as my sons come in for a tween thanksgiving day, christmas day and just before I get my prostate ripped out. I will return, with a smile next thursday.

peace out

Looking forawrd to your return!
I'm sorry, I was all sentimental and in deep thought and then you said you were getting your prostate ripped out. Is that the technical medical term? ;)

I never understood NOT donating organs upon death. I certainly won't be needing them anymore. That has to be the most selfless decision a family makes. That was so touching of the man who received her lungs.

See you soon and good luck, we'll be waiting for you to post!
just saw your comment on Leesa's blog...about going for surgery on Monday...
Good Luck and speedy recovery!
Organ donation is such a selfless act. I can't imagine losing a child. Peace!
It will be held in Saskatchewan, Canada. On the Beardy's Reserve, close to Duck Lake.

I am Cree.

I do know a few words in Cree.

I love reading about legends and stories of our past.

The German side to the family won't speak of their past. I do know that my grandfather was a driver for Hitler....
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